Natalie-
There are two more suggestions I want to purpose.
1. Your arguments are persuasive. But I think transitions should be added to make a natural flow between paragraphs. Sometimes I feel a little jump between paragraphs.
2. Conclusion paragraph. You've talked a lot about the reason to increase the access of the Internet. (research, e-mails..etc) I think you should wrap them up in the conclusion paragraph instead of just mentioning "academics and social networking" in general.